February 6, 2015
Dear Progress: What are your thoughts on being a single mother and dating?
Dear Mama: If you’re feeling ready to get back out there I’d say… Go out there and get it gurl!
Here are 5 tips to consider:
1. Understand that it is perfectly okay for you to have a life! Don’t allow folks to have you thinking it’s wrong to want attention and affection. You’re worthy of getting back out there and having a great night out with someone you find interesting. It’s your life. Get it and live it!
2. Do not spend the date bad mouthing your ex. I mean really love! That’s not cool, plus you’ll leave the impression that you’re really not over your ex. Get to know your date. Use this time to find out about his interests, hobbies and career. Focus on him and not how bad your exes and/or child’s father did you!
3. Be the example of what healthy dating looks like for your children. No sleepovers at your place with your children present. If your date turned out to be not such a great guy please refrain from cussing him and his future grandchildren in front of your kids. This new guy is also not your child’s babysitter. Would you want your adult children to leave their own children with people they only just met a few weeks prior? Hopefully NO! So you don’t do it either.
4. Don’t expect him to be everything that your exes were not. Allow him to be his own man and don’t put your ex’s problems on him to carry. He’s not here to save you from every disappointment and frustration you’ve had in your life. Chill out love. Yes, you may have experienced madness from previous men but it wasn’t him who took you through it.
5. Get your confidence up. Identify all of the great things you love about you and speak them out loud on a regular basis to yourself. Hook up your wardrobe with pieces that make you feel alive and beautiful. Before you leave the house for your date give yourself a pep talk in the mirror. Channel that inner woman that knows she looks good and feels good and is ALL OF THAT!
Enjoy yourself mama! You deserve it.
Named one of BRAVA Magazine's 2015 Women to Watch, Sabrina Madison or as you may know her “Heymiss Progress” is a poet, motivational speaker, entrepreneur and change agent. She can be reached through her website, About Sabrina "HeyMiss Progress" Madison, at www.heymissprogress.com.